


Closely Related

by emmaliza



Category: A Song of Ice and Fire & Related Fandoms, Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: Bickering, Crack, F/M, Gen, I live to troll Bran Stark, Pseudo-Incest, R plus L equals J, Season 6 Spoilers, Showverse mostly for the sake of jokes, You Know Nothing Arya Stark
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-15
Updated: 2016-12-15
Packaged: 2018-09-08 18:31:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 890
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8856313
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/emmaliza/pseuds/emmaliza
Summary: "Why exactly should I believe this is genuine? Why should I believe you ever would have looked twice at Jon before you found out he wasn't father's bastard?”Jon and Sansa share a very uncomfortable look.





	

**Author's Note:**

> This was born of two valar_morekinks prompts, which shall be detailed at the end so as not to spoil anything.

“I can't believe you!”

“Arya, please, you've got to understand–”

“Oh, I understand just perfectly.” Arya knows how petty she must sound, more like the eleven year old who left Winterfell than the master assassin who's travelled most of Westeros and a good bit of Essos, but still. “Better than he does, at least. Really Jon, you fell for this?”

Jon blinks at her, confused. “Um – what?”

“She's only interested in you because she thinks you're a stupid Targaryen!”

Jon and Sansa share a look.

“I mean, he is a Targaryen,” Sansa points out.

“See!”

Jon sighs. “Arya... it's not like that.”

“Oh really?” Arya raises an eyebrow at him. “She never liked you, remember, never thought of you as our _real_ brother. But now you're a prince, she's all over you, she probably says she wants to marry you! She just wants to be queen, and she can play on all your old brotherly feelings you don't have an outlet for anymore.”

Sansa and Jon stare at each other again. Sansa raises an eyebrow, and Jon's eyes go wide, before he hurriedly shakes his head. Arya frowns, feeling like she's missed out on something.

“What?”

“Nothing!” says Jon. “Just – listen to me, Arya. I appreciate your concern, but that's not why our relationship began. We are in love. I know it's going to be strange, but–”

“ _You're_ in love,” Arya interrupts him. “She's not in love with anything but that pointy chair you're in line for.”

“Really, Arya, do you not think I might have learned my lesson from the last time I fell for a boy in line to a stupid pointy chair?” Sansa asks. “I'm not feeling a lot of sisterly love and respect here.”

“Well, sorry. But why exactly should I believe this is genuine? Why should I believe you ever would have looked twice at Jon before you found out he wasn't father's bastard?”

Jon and Sansa share another very uncomfortable look. Arya frowns. “What?!”

“Um, guys?” Comes a fourth voice, and Arya peers over Jon and Sansa's shoulders to see Bran poking his head around the door. “Is this an argument the whole family should be involved in?”

“No,” says Jon. “This is an argument you should walk away from right now. Please.”

Bran frowns, and looks at Sansa – who merely averts her eyes bashfully. Then he looks to Arya. “Arya, what is going on?”

Oh, thank the gods. Bran will back her up here. “Sansa seduced Jon so she can be queen!” she cries. “Jon won't believe me, but it's obvious – she never would have thought about it when he was just her bastard brother. Bran, tell him!”

Bran says nothing, just blinks, frowns, and then looks back and forth between Jon and Sansa. “Really,” he says.

“Bran, please don't,” Jon and Sansa manage to say simultaneously. Bran raises an eyebrow, and Arya, again, feels like she's missing something.

“I suppose she's right,” drawls Bran, “you two would never have considered sleeping together when you thought your were brother and sister, would you?”

“Half-brother and sister,” Sansa points out, and Bran just glares at her.

Okay, this has gotten weird. “Do you know something I don't?” Arya asks Bran.

He looks at her briefly, then back to Jon and Sansa. “Do you want to tell her, or do I?”

Jon sighs, and then turns towards Arya. “Me and Sansa... this... We might have...” Jon gives up halfway through his sentence, instead just chewing on his lip nervously, so instead Sansa takes over.

“We started sleeping together before we found out he wasn't Father's.”

Arya blinks at this information. “Oh.”

“What do you mean, 'oh'?” Bran asks from behind them. “I'm not sure you understand. They started sleeping together _before_ they knew they weren't brother and sister. Incest. It's generally considered bad. And I walked in on them – for want of a better phrase – do you have any idea how awkward that was?”

“Are you really still this mad at us?” Sansa asks. Bran glares again.

“Well given last time I walked in on a brother and sister together I got thrown from a window and crippled for life and it started a war that killed half our family and ruined all our lives, _yes_.”

Arya is still thinking this all over. Then she shrugs. “Okay then,” she says. “Sorry Sansa. You're right, I was too suspicious. Just, you know – someone ought to be protective of him. But if you do break his heart, I will cut your face off. Literally. I know how to do that now.”

Sansa nods along. “Alright,” she says. “I can respect that.”

Bran makes a dismayed noise. “Arya – this is not how this is meant to go!”

“And how is this meant to go, exactly?”

“This is – this is _meant_ to go like you agreeing with me and telling them how sick and wrong this is!”

Arya shrugs again. “I mean, I've baked people into pie,” she says. “I'm probably not the best person to be judging what's sick and wrong.”

Bran makes another dismayed noise, and Jon sighs. “Bran, if you're this annoyed about it, why did you tell everyone we weren't related and make everything way easier for us?”

This catches Bran off guard, and he takes a moment to consider it. “...Good question.”

Arya snorts.

 

**Author's Note:**

> So the two prompts were:
> 
> "Arya blames Sansa for Jon and Sansa’s relationship, accusing Sansa of seducing Jon because he was a Targaryen prince. Now Jon and Sansa face the dilemma of whether to disclose to her that they became lovers long before that revelation."
> 
> and
> 
> "Bran, Jon/Sansa - about that incest. He knows R + L = J, they don't. He doesn't get around to telling them before he catches them in bed together. Bonus if he's not 100% sure he doesn't want to let them stew in shame a bit longer (because seriously, you two? After the bullshit we went through with the Lannisters? Seriously?)"


End file.
